Showing Up for Your Dreams
Somewhere at some point I heard RuPaul talking about luck.
I think it might have been her podcast, “What’s the Tee?” with Michelle Visage which I used to listen to before audio books took over any listening time I had. But in some episode, in passing, RuPaul said something like this -
Luck is just showing up in the path of good fortune over and over and over again.
I believe that. You can’t win the lottery if you don’t buy a ticket.
For some reason, it’s been harder to apply that same thinking to my dreams. Maybe because ‘luck’ is random. ‘Dreams’ are things I want deeply. Dreams are stories I tell myself about my life like a wish.
I have only recently felt my dream of becoming an author coming true.
You know. You’ve been here. You saw the announcement about my April 10th presale. I made the announcement here and on Instagram, and I immediately became washed away in the swell of cheers and love.
The love is still coming (THANK YOU!), and in some moments, when I’m alone working in my attic, I think about this dream coming true.
I’ve wanted to be a writer since I was a child. I’ve talked about it for years. I’ve dreamed of writing down stories that matter to me and sharing them.
And then I started doing it. I started writing this book, the one headed into your hands. And it was hard. It took hours and hours and hours of sitting alone, days and days of work over months that eventually became years.
I wrote into the dark hours of the night. I wrote in the hours before sunrise in the morning. I wrote and wrote and wrote, trying on my best days to find the golden threads of light that shimmered and sang to me. On my worst days I simply tried to face my biggest fears. When I couldn’t get those fears to go away, I asked that they at least sit quietly next to me so I could keep on writing.
I feared that I’d never finish. I feared that it wouldn’t matter if I finished. I feared that no one would care that I finished. I feared that I wouldn’t like what I made after all this time trying to make it.
And still, I just kept writing.
And when I couldn’t keep myself going, you (and you know who you are) kept telling me that it mattered and that I should keep going. So I kept writing.
And then, last week, I was able to tell you that yes, it’s happening. There will be a book. And my dream of becoming a published author is coming true.
It works this way, I guess. The alchemy of turning dreams into reality is still so much of a mystery, but part of the magical recipe is this - just keep doing it. Just keep believing in the dream, damn the torpedoes.
And if you keep showing up, if you do the work with belief in your heart, on sunny days and on stormy ones, one day you’ll show up again. But this time, on this day, your dream will begin to come true.
For me, this is one of those days. Thank you for sharing this day with me.
I can’t wait to share this book with you.
XO
PS. I so so so so love that people have signed up for special video reminders on the day my presale launches. If you want one (think Cameo-style but free!), sign up here:
